Okay, seriously, people! Am I to believe that NO ONE out there thinks this is hot, or even CUTE, but me?
Note to self: apparently, you are a freak.
Oh well. I don’t really care what you think, internet. Dave will always have my fond affection, even if he never looks my way because my debts aren’t big enough.
Heh. Heh. My debts. Aren’t big enough. Heh.
You know what else is cute? This Wiggle:
He’s the blue one. If he rolled around in the dirt and got all sweaty, he might even be hawt.
Also, bunnies. There honestly is nothing cuter than a bunny. Yes, they are! They are, too! See?
Oh my asdlkjfedsa;tgewyipuio. I think I just died. No, I’m certain I did. That is some serious, terminal cuteness right there. And you are some sort of subhumanoid robotic androidinal submarine cave-dweller troglodyte if you don’t agree.
Not that I would ever intentionally offend anyone!
In other news, I got my hair cut. Off. I used to think I couldn’t pull off super-short because I don’t have what might be classified as a petite little dewdrop of a face such as the beautiful Halle Berry (besides the fact that I am irrevocably and unrelentingly caucasion, dadgummit), but as I get older I just don’t care anymore. I want short hair, by golly, and I’m gonna have short hair, even if I DO have the world’s largest chin and nose. Okay, second largest. My twin, Glenn Close, has the largest.
I probably should have put on some lipstick first.
The last time I ever had my hair this short was when I was about 10 years old and someone mistook my older brother and me for twins. Twin BOYS.
That’s a bit of a downer for a little girl.
Here’s a picture of my brother, by the way.
I think the resemblance is strongest around the eyes.
Haha! No, really, here’s a picture of my brother:
Wow. Maybe we really are twins! I can’t tell us apart. Am I the one with 12 kids, or the one who is a bachelor carpenter in Arizona?
When we were kids and we’d ask our mom what she wanted for Christmas, she’d always say the same thing: “A little peace and quiet”. And then we’d groan and shake our heads vigorously and yell “NO MOM, WHAT DO YOU REEEEEALLY WANT?!?!?” As if we had any power to give her anything anyway, since we never had any sort of allowance of any kind. Come to think of it, we *could* have given her peace and quiet. But she so obviously did NOT want that!
So Mom…what do you want for Christmas?
I’ll tell you what I want: I want peace and quiet, sure, but I also want chocolate-covered rainbows to drench my house in sunny sunshine every day of my life until sweet gumdrop flowers sprout from my lawn and coconuts filled with gold dubloons drop from the clouds and smash upon the pavement so that I can buy an ever-blooming vitamin-truffle tree for every single living being on the planet.
While we’re at it, I’d also like a giant hammer to swing down out of the sky and obliterate anyone who terrorizes, victimizes, or otherwise ~izes the innocents of the world.
And a french bulldog puppy. And a bunny.
It’s not a big dream, it’s just a little dream.
So, to recap: Blue Wiggle, bunnies, new haircut, twins, peace and quiet, giant hammer.
I gotta get back to building houses now. Oh wait, that’s my brother! I mean, I better get back to wrapping presents.